Unwanted Additions

Today I bought myself an M&M — or “Rainbow” — cookie from Starbucks. When I got back to my desk to get down to business, the bag I received had two things in it: 1. my cookie and 2. the piece of waxy tissue paper used by the barista to pick up the cookie.

I assume that the baristas use the tissue paper to maintain the illusion of cleanliness during the transaction. I mean, those same hands are handling my money, and who knows where that’s been, right? But doesn’t it defeat the purpose of her putting the tissue paper inside the bag?

That’s like a dentist giving you the latex gloves he/she uses after your visit.

I’ve thought way too much on this topic, and have come to determine that there is never a need to have the tissue put in the bag for you. Even if you were going to split the cookie with someone, the bag itself (which I’ll let you rate on your own “probability of cleanliness” scale) can be used as a faux-glove to handle breakage.

Am I crazy? Isn’t this a weird concept? I’m singling out Starbucks because today pushed me over the edge, but they’re not the only place that does it. Just about all bakeries do. As far as I'm concerned, it’s a bad practice.

The solution to this whole thing is that I should probably just stop buying cookies. I don’t need the calories, anyway.

Comments

Tuesday, Dec 9, 2008 / 4:41pm Nick said…

This always bothered me about Family Practice clinics...but on a larger scale. At a family practice, when you leave....99% of the time you have to walk back through the waiting room....which is where all the SICK people are. The conversation occurs in my head, "Gee, thanks for curing that cough doc...let me walk right back out through the cesspool that is your waiting room". fyi, not a germaphobe, but it has always struck me as funny.

Tuesday, Dec 9, 2008 / 4:54pm Fred LeBlanc said…

It's not as bad though. Normally you only get a prescription paper to fill somewhere else, so you're not really cured anyway.

But I'd sure as heck hate to be a pharmacist, handling those germ-ridden order forms.

Tuesday, Dec 9, 2008 / 4:57pm Nick said…

True, I haven't been to a family practice since my High School physical days. So maybe the play in my head was really "Thanks for the sports physical (and warming your hands first, right fellas)...oh and for the flu which I'm sure I'll pick up on my way out".

Wednesday, Dec 10, 2008 / 9:32am Nick Grant said…

Have you tried using the supplied wax paper as a crumb catching device?

Maybe this isn't a case of you receiving unwanted materials but more of a case of not knowing what to do with all the supplied parts. Recently I just picked up a book on Origami, I could make a pretty cool Crane out of that sheet.

This could be Starbucks way of asking you to expand your mind.

Wednesday, Dec 10, 2008 / 3:28pm Adrian said…

LOL I can just see the mites and fleas jumping off the paper onto your cookie in ravenous glee!

Friday, Dec 12, 2008 / 1:20pm Melissa Maguire said…

You guys are worse then me, I thought I was the office germaphobe. I think I would rather have the illusion that people aren't touching my food rather then see them wipe their nose and grab my cookie with the same bare hand.

Monday, Dec 15, 2008 / 9:25am Robert Mohns said…

@nickgrant: bingo, that's what i always thought it was for. reduce infringement of crumbs upon keyboard and shirt!

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